When you know you're NOT ready...

Over the weekend I attended a friend's wedding. It was a lovely affair with a lot of fun people and I was glad to be invited and have the opportunity to attend. Among the guests there was a 6 mo baby boy who is so adorable you can't help but want to be near him. He has giant, round, sky blue eyes and perfectly plump cheeks which dimple when he smiles and his head is a perfect, bald circle of baby deliciousness. I couldn't keep myself away ... at first. This beautiful little man was passed from person to person and was giggling and wiggling with everyone for some time before the general crowd wearied of their baby lust. When the crowd's enthusiasm died down I was the one left holding him and, I must admit, some of my excitement had left me due to his overall state of constant wiggling and drooling. Not knowing what else to do, I decided to buckle him into his carrier and let him hang out there for a bit but a few seconds after doing so I was distracted and wandered away from him. Approximately 10 minutes later I gasped, mid-conversation, and remembered I had just left him there with no one to watch over him! I ran back to where I had left him and he was out of the carrier being loved by a mom longing to be a grandma so "no harm, no foul". The experience left me with this revelation: I'm not ready to be a parent. I mean, I forgot about him while I "partied" with friends! Now, let me put this out there ... Urban Cowboy and I are not trying to have kids for awhile so it's not as though this revelation puts the breaks on any plans we have but I'm still really nervous about the idea of how to know when you're ready and how to properly take care of another human being! Eegats...the responsibility...the committment...the fear!!!