Thursday, February 23, 2012

Brain Clutter

Whenever I have a lot of anxiety in one area of my life, I find myself filled with a large number of completely random thoughts that seem to distract me from the source of my anxiety.  Case in point?  Our babysitter (whom the kids & Urban Cowboy & I adore!) announced she is quitting for a much better opportunity.  The new job is so much better than what we can offer her that I can't even be mad at her for giving me 2 weeks to find someone new.  Grrr.  Am I upset about it?  Yes.  But I'm not such a bad person that I can't see the value of what she will be doing and how it will help her professionally.  Here is a quick list of random thoughts I've been thinking:
- The song TORN (N. Ambruglia) has been stuck in my head (thanks, Sirius) and the date the radio listed it as coming out was sometime in 1997 - I'm shocked by this because I seem to feel as though I have distinct memory of watching this video on MTV (do they still make/play music videos anymore, I don't even know) while I was getting ready to go to school in 1996.  But then after I obsessed over this for a few days I think I must be getting TORN's video slightly jumbled with STAY (by L. Loeb). 
- watched a documentary about Whales/Dolphins and can't stop thinking about how cool it would be to have a conversation with a dolphin
- Really want to set up a sewing area in my bedroom so I wouldn't have to take down the machine each time I needed to take a break (usually kid induced) from a project
- Was at aerobics and did a routine I used to do when I first started Jazzercise and totally rocked it living in a nostalgic cloud of memories of the good 'ol days of L & Me.
- Mad as a hornet about a new Wal-Mart shopping center going into the East side - total waste of green space (144 acres of it!) to add more retail to an already retail-saturated strip of the world!  Ri-donk-u-less!
- Wondering where I can find a "No CLE Incinerator" sign to put in my front yard
- Etc.
Finally, today I said something kind of funny and if you're still reading this you'll laugh, too:
"Sometimes I forget myself and I'm me".  Maybe you don't get it but I bet you do.  We all have those moments and some of us more than others.  Me?  More than others, yep.

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