Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Unemployed

I am no longer employed.  I resigned from my part-time job.  A lot of heartache, gut-wrenching soul searching, prayer, and seeking others advice finally resulted in me choosing to take time out of the traditional professional work place and focus on my babies.  The week after I submitted my resignation, I was fairly depressed and wholly doubtful I made the correct decision.  Now, 2 weeks after my resignation, I am mostly at peace with my choice and have noticed a definite calming of my soul and uplift of my spirit.  Each day Little Man and Urban Cowbaby do something so amazing or so entertaining or so endearing that I marvel at my good fortune to be at home with them.  Yes, at least once I day I ask myself how I gave up a "perfect" situation - I was only working 22.5 hours a week, right - but then I remember that everyone has a different vision of perfect and we all manage our lives and individual situations in our own ways.  I was not contributing at work in the manner I wanted to, nor was I contributing at home to the capacity I wanted and, therefore, I was barely holding on to each world and barely doing enough to keep each world in some kind of order.  My new shift of priorities and focus has allowed me to release a tremendous amount of anxiety I was constantly feeling and has allowed me to feel really accomplished at the end of each day.

Of course, one thing I have noticed about myself each summer I have had off from work is that I sorely lack discipline and time management.  That said, I have a goal to be better (like, be more mindful of keeping up with the on-line life) and I know the fall will force me to manage our time better because we will be juggling pre-school with music class with eurythmics class, play dates, etc.  Soon to come?  Pictures of the kids and more frequent posts.

Oh, and I should mention...I'm not going to truly be out of the professional realm because I have been referred by a colleague to a independent consulting opportunity and am currently in the process of on-boarding with that organization.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

WOW am I behind the times. I'm both sorry for you and very, very pleased. I genuinely believe you can make no more meaningful contribution to this world than raising healthy, happy children. Congratulations!